YOUR G SPOT AND OTHER SENSITIVE SPOTS

You may have heard about a place in your vagina that when touched is supposed to drive you wild. This place is often called the G spot, named for physician Ernest Gräfenberg, who first described it in 1950. More recently, it has also been called the inner trigger point and the urethral sponge. Although the idea of the G spot is not new, it is still controversial, some women finding the G spot and others not. The current theory is that the G spot is a collection of glands, ducts, blood vessels, and nerve endings that surround a woman’s urethra. So where exactly is it? Most women who report finding their G spot describe it as located one and a half to two inches from the opening of their vagina. You can feel it through the upper front wall, just behind your pubic bone (see figure 18). If you imagine a clock with your clitoris as twelve o’clock, the G spot is usually somewhere between eleven and one. When you are not aroused, your G spot is difficult to find. When stimulated, it can swell to the size of a dime or larger, standing out from the wall of the vagina. Alan and Donna Brauer suggest that the best time to find it is just after you have orgasmed: “It is already somewhat enlarged and sensitive. It often feels like little ridges or tiny bumps.” They recommend stroking it (or having your partner stroke it) at the rate of about once a second and experimenting with both lighter and heavier pressure. Another good time to stimulate the G spot is when you are just approaching orgasm, since you are more likely to enjoy G-spot stimulation once you are already highly aroused. You should be aware that some women feel initial discomfort or the urge to urinate when their G spot is stimulated. This is normal. If it happens to you, the Brauers suggest lightening your touch or telling your partner to lighten his. It may take as much as a minute for the discomfort or seeming need to urinate to be replaced with pleasurable sensations. If you are concerned about urinating, you might urinate before lovemaking or try finding the G spot while sitting on the toilet, which will allow you to feel confident that your bladder is empty. In the common face-to-face or missionary position, your partner’s penis often misses your G spot completely. It is easier for your partner to stimulate it if you lie on your stomach and your partner enters you from behind, or if you are on top, where you can position yourself for maximum pleasure. Shallow thrusting is also best for stimulating the G spot. However, fingers (yours or his) are usually the most direct and effective way to get to the G spot at first. Some women report that their most sensitive spots are located at the four o’clock and eight o'clock positions about midway back along the walls of the vagina. There are nerve bundles at these locations, which may explain their sensitivity to pressure. Other women find that they are most sensitive at the back of their vagina. As your partner learns shallow and deep thrusting in different directions (what we call screwing), he will be able to stimulate these spots and others that are all your own. Most women are able to rotate their pelvis when they are on top to direct their partner's penis to their most sensitive spots. As we discussed, there are many benefits to this woman-on-top position, and not only for the woman, since many men have an easier time learning to be multi-orgasmic when they are on the bottom. However, this position also has its disadvantages: the angle of penetration in this position can make your partner’s penis seem as much as an inch shorter.than in other positions, and it is more difficult for your partner to maintain an erection for an extended period of time,
since gravity tends to draw blood out of his penis. When women are on the bottom, they often do not realize that they
can actively rotate their pelvis, and especially their sacrum, to guide their partner’s penis to their most sensitive spots.
Once you and your partner learn to rock ’n’ roll your pelvises, you will really be "dirty” dancing. (For a longer discussion
about various lovemaking positions, see the section called “Positions for Pleasure and Health”.