Although cunnilingus is quite possibly the easiest and most direct approach
to getting your partner to reach orgasm, this may not necessarily happen
Don’t stress! Your partner will still enjoy your efforts a lot. As you become
more and more experienced, your ability to bring her to orgasm will likely
increase, possibly to the point where she orgasms every time you perform
cunnilingus. This is the part where it is important to pay attention to her
sounds and movements as well as discussing with your partner what she
likes best during cunnilingus.
If you’re not comfortable yet asking her directly about her likes and dislikes,
if you pay attention to what she’s doing during cunnilingus you will most
likely be able to figure out for yourself which movements bring down the
house. Movements and sounds that will alert you to an impending orgasm
is bucking and shuddering (particularly her legs) and she may be gasping
for air or making a lot of noise or none at all. If you’ve ever given her an
orgasm before (whether by cunnilingus or other means), you will more than
likely be able to recognize when she is on the verge of a mind-bending big
O. Once you start receiving cues that your partner is feeling really good,
continue licking and sucking her vulva in the same manner until her
orgasm. You can, of course, do a few variations, but most of the fancy
tongue movements are for the beginning when she’s really getting warmed
up. Most women, like men, need repetition when they are close to bring
them to orgasm.If you and your partner are comfortable with talking to each other about
cunnilingus, this can be of great help to a man. Men function best when
given clear, direct instructions and if your partner is willing, she can tell you exactly what she likes, where she likes it and when to do it. In this way,
she can take control of her pleasure while still experiencing the wonderful
and exhilarating feelings of cunnilingus. You can help her to be more open
to expressing her likes and dislikes through conversation by asking her
questions about what feels good. You can say in a hot, breathy voice into
her vulva “Do you like that?” You will almost always be able to tell by the
enthusiasm in her voice whether she truly likes the movements or not. And
she may surprise you by just saying no! If you sense that she does not like a movement, switch to something else
and ask her if she likes that better. If nothing seems to be working, don’t
get frustrated! If nothing is feeling good for her, she will be frustrated
enough for the both of you! Ask her gently to suggest a movement that she
would like more and you can even ask her to demonstrate what she would
like on your mouth. Keeping the lines of communication open is essential
to her experiencing an orgasm. It is possible that she won’t, however, no
matter how hard you try. If you find yourself in this situation, try to bring her
to orgasm using a sure-fire method that you know will work, such as using
your fingers or intercourse. You may want to have a list of questions ready
to ask though, because she may not be able to give you a blow-by-blow of
exactly what she wants. Think of some questions beforehand so you can
ask (and be sure to ask her gently) what she would like - all you will need
from her is a simple nod or shake of her head! This makes it much easier
on her – she may not even know what she wants at this point and
suggestions can help her figure out what strokes and techniques she likes
the best. Some good questions to ask are: Do you like this speed? Would you like me to go faster or
slower? Just a little faster (or slower) or a lot?
Š Would you like me to continue moving or stop moving for
just a moment? If you want me to stop, just give me the
green light to go again.
Š Is this stroke good? Would you like me to continue using
this technique? Let me know if you’d like me to change it
up a bit.
Š Would you like harder or softer strokes, or do you like the
pressure I am applying right now?
Š If this is not the right spot, I would like you to show me
exactly where you would like me to move to.
Š Would you like me to move my tongue around in circles
like this, or do you prefer another type of movement?
Š Do you like long tongue strokes or short ones?
Š Would you like me to use a little suction or possibly a little
more pressure? Let me know what feels good to you or
what would feel better. There will be times in which she doesn’t want to have an orgasm at all, but
is simply enjoying your efforts. That’s fine, but it is also another reason
why communication is so important. If she is not going to experience an orgasm, it is important that she tells you before you become frustrated as
well. Don’t react harshly if she does tell you that she is not going to have
an orgasm (or you sense that she is not) because you may turn her off
cunnilingus entirely or at least for a while. If you feel that her body wants to
have an orgasm but for some reason it is just not happening (even if you’ve
tried using your hands or intercourse) give her the freedom to finish her
orgasm for herself. She may want you to watch or she may need privacy.
This is, of course, the last resort, but if you find yourself in this situation a
time or two, don’t be judgmental about it and just let her get her groove on.
to getting your partner to reach orgasm, this may not necessarily happen
Don’t stress! Your partner will still enjoy your efforts a lot. As you become
more and more experienced, your ability to bring her to orgasm will likely
increase, possibly to the point where she orgasms every time you perform
cunnilingus. This is the part where it is important to pay attention to her
sounds and movements as well as discussing with your partner what she
likes best during cunnilingus.
If you’re not comfortable yet asking her directly about her likes and dislikes,
if you pay attention to what she’s doing during cunnilingus you will most
likely be able to figure out for yourself which movements bring down the
house. Movements and sounds that will alert you to an impending orgasm
is bucking and shuddering (particularly her legs) and she may be gasping
for air or making a lot of noise or none at all. If you’ve ever given her an
orgasm before (whether by cunnilingus or other means), you will more than
likely be able to recognize when she is on the verge of a mind-bending big
O. Once you start receiving cues that your partner is feeling really good,
continue licking and sucking her vulva in the same manner until her
orgasm. You can, of course, do a few variations, but most of the fancy
tongue movements are for the beginning when she’s really getting warmed
up. Most women, like men, need repetition when they are close to bring
them to orgasm.If you and your partner are comfortable with talking to each other about
cunnilingus, this can be of great help to a man. Men function best when
given clear, direct instructions and if your partner is willing, she can tell you exactly what she likes, where she likes it and when to do it. In this way,
she can take control of her pleasure while still experiencing the wonderful
and exhilarating feelings of cunnilingus. You can help her to be more open
to expressing her likes and dislikes through conversation by asking her
questions about what feels good. You can say in a hot, breathy voice into
her vulva “Do you like that?” You will almost always be able to tell by the
enthusiasm in her voice whether she truly likes the movements or not. And
she may surprise you by just saying no! If you sense that she does not like a movement, switch to something else
and ask her if she likes that better. If nothing seems to be working, don’t
get frustrated! If nothing is feeling good for her, she will be frustrated
enough for the both of you! Ask her gently to suggest a movement that she
would like more and you can even ask her to demonstrate what she would
like on your mouth. Keeping the lines of communication open is essential
to her experiencing an orgasm. It is possible that she won’t, however, no
matter how hard you try. If you find yourself in this situation, try to bring her
to orgasm using a sure-fire method that you know will work, such as using
your fingers or intercourse. You may want to have a list of questions ready
to ask though, because she may not be able to give you a blow-by-blow of
exactly what she wants. Think of some questions beforehand so you can
ask (and be sure to ask her gently) what she would like - all you will need
from her is a simple nod or shake of her head! This makes it much easier
on her – she may not even know what she wants at this point and
suggestions can help her figure out what strokes and techniques she likes
the best. Some good questions to ask are: Do you like this speed? Would you like me to go faster or
slower? Just a little faster (or slower) or a lot?
Š Would you like me to continue moving or stop moving for
just a moment? If you want me to stop, just give me the
green light to go again.
Š Is this stroke good? Would you like me to continue using
this technique? Let me know if you’d like me to change it
up a bit.
Š Would you like harder or softer strokes, or do you like the
pressure I am applying right now?
Š If this is not the right spot, I would like you to show me
exactly where you would like me to move to.
Š Would you like me to move my tongue around in circles
like this, or do you prefer another type of movement?
Š Do you like long tongue strokes or short ones?
Š Would you like me to use a little suction or possibly a little
more pressure? Let me know what feels good to you or
what would feel better. There will be times in which she doesn’t want to have an orgasm at all, but
is simply enjoying your efforts. That’s fine, but it is also another reason
why communication is so important. If she is not going to experience an orgasm, it is important that she tells you before you become frustrated as
well. Don’t react harshly if she does tell you that she is not going to have
an orgasm (or you sense that she is not) because you may turn her off
cunnilingus entirely or at least for a while. If you feel that her body wants to
have an orgasm but for some reason it is just not happening (even if you’ve
tried using your hands or intercourse) give her the freedom to finish her
orgasm for herself. She may want you to watch or she may need privacy.
This is, of course, the last resort, but if you find yourself in this situation a
time or two, don’t be judgmental about it and just let her get her groove on.
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