Tantra: Another Way to Sacred Pleasure

The word tantra comes from the union of the root word tan, mean- ing "to extend, to expand," and the suffix tra, referring to an instru- ment. Tantra, therefore, is an instrument for the expansion of ordinary consciousness in order to access the root of the self as well as the un- known potential that it may be possible to use and awaken. The Tantra discipline, or Tantra yoga, was developed through the rituals, practices, and meditations found in various sacred books from India. These books, which are over two thousand years old, were writ- ten as dialogues between the Hindu god Shiva, "the penetrating power of focused energy," and his mate Shakti, who represents the creative female force, sometimes called "the power of Tantra." In Tantra, the universe is alive. From the most distant star to the smallest subatomic particle, everything is inhabited by some form of consciousness. The universe is consciousness and energy combined. In practice, this leads to a respect for all life, both animal and vegetable. When anyone harms any form of life, they are damaging their own life—ecology becomes cosmic. For couples seeking a significantly different way to relate to each other and keep love and passion alive for a long time, Tantra provides some very important tools. Tantric sex does not promise instant results—it is not a "one- minute" technique to gain sexual skills. But for couples who wish to enrich their relationship, it can release a special type of energy that enhances harmony and increases sexual pleasure and intimacy. Tantric sex can create an extraordinary sense of companionship between the partners. Tantra's Ancient Secrets The mysterious and often misrepresented Tantra discipline includes a set of ancient techniques, doctrines, and rituals designed to unite the human mind with the infinite. According to Tantra, the universe was born from the cosmic union of the male and female principles. This conception includes Tantric sex, combining the wisdom of the plea- sures inherent in human nature and the pleasures that come to us through the mystical path that bridges human love to divine love. Tantra seeks the expansion of the mind by freeing energy from the fet- ters that bind it to the dense dimensions of matter. Tantra is the system whereby Shakti, the primordial energy, is released. To achieve this, it is necessary to work diligently with a proper diet, proper breathing (pranayama), proper exercise, proper relaxation, and proper thoughts (meditation). At the same time, making love is an ideal opportunity for the con- scious circulation of energy, and either partner may cause his or her own energy as well as the energy of the partner to circulate. Energy circulates when we make love, but it is often lost due to a lack of awareness. It is important to familiarize ourselves with the sen- sation of a free flow of energy in order to recognize it consciously. It is surprising to realize how easily the mind is able to feel the flow of en- ergy if we let our intuition get in contact with the body of our partner. Deep breathing enables us to experience the energy flow. We can see that certain parts of the body feel awakened, while others are asleep or less stimulated. Tantric erotic positions, known as bandhas (locks), were devised to inwardly channel the energy flowing outward. Hands and feet are used frequently as aids in this extremely important process: to cause sexual energy to circulate instead of that energy being lost. An essential ingre- dient in Tantric practice is to honor the inner spirit. That is how love assumes its liberating and truly eternal character. The sexual relationship consists then of delivering one's sexuality to another person. When someone accepts the sexual act as a gift, ex- changes take place at various levels: a physical exchange of secretions, a psychophysical exchange of vital polarities and energies, a karmic ex- change through the convergence of destinies, and a spiritual exchange in the communion of spirits. All these exchanges enhance the quality of the couple's relationship. Tantra does not advise prolonged sexual abstinence, since it leads to the accumulation of unnatural sexual currents inside the body. Reten- tion consists of maintaining pleasure as a light in the midst of a storm. Tantric texts underscore the importance of "absorbing your partner's equivalent" when there is a release of vital fluids. The loss of semen, which originates from all parts of the body, weakens the man and shortens his life. To counteract the loss caused by ejaculation, the man must consciously absorb the woman's secretions, for which there are various techniques. In any event, the retention of semen or the conscious control of ejaculation is a personal issue, since it doesn't affect a twenty-year-old young man in the same way as a fifty-year-old adult. The loss of energy through ejaculation has a different meaning for each individual, so each must decide when and how to establish his own frequency. At the highest levels of eroticism, orgasm becomes merely a point in time, a further incentive in the state of intense and continuous physical and emotional splendor that lovers successfully evoke in each other. Sex is not considered a sensation, but a feeling. The attraction is not an appetite, but an "eye-to-eye contact." Love is not a reaction, but a carefully fostered creation, a prolonged mental and bodily ec- stasy whose flames are kept alive by the prolonged stimulation of the sexual organs and not by the mere reciprocal release. In this sense, the rituals accompanying the sex acts also convey charges of accumulated energy. The positions and internal contractions that take place in the course of the Tantric union are based on this conception of sexual love. But the special condition of inner splendor that they provoke only manifests when the erotic focus of attention shifts from the ex- ternal and sensorial personification of desire to the inner goddess of which all external women are a manifestation. In this sense, the sat- isfaction of the woman is extremely important, since only with such satisfaction will a woman bestow all of her initiation potential on her lover. Both the woman and man, therefore, are key to reciprocal de- light. This does not mean that one will lose value in the eyes of the other. Quite the contrary—because each will become a divinity in the other person's eyes. Sex is not only an act whereby bodies find each other with a greater or lesser degree of surrender and satisfaction. It isn't a dirty word either. It is the starting point of life. We need to become friends with the power- ful sexual energy that modifies all things. Oftentimes we behave as if body and sex were our enemies. The perception of our sexuality, whether complete, normal, or unexplored, is a true reflection of our lives. When well understood, sexuality holds the key that opens the door to the knowledge of being and our inner self. It doesn't matter if we still have issues pending on this subject; we always have the opportunity to achieve deep knowledge on how to develop our sexual energy through various physical exercises, seeking out those that best fit our lifestyle and personality and are compatible with the people with whom we relate sexually and emotionally. When the body and the spirit are in balance, you start the journey to total and complete love. Tantra's Erotic Rituals We can develop our sexual energy alone or as a couple through various techniques: active meditations, visualizations, rituals, and through the knowledge of various symbols, such as internal colors and energy cen- ters, or chakras. This attitude endows the relationship with many advantages. We grow closer to our beloved with the respect and devotion he or she de- serves, and by so doing, we evoke in him or her, and therefore in our- selves, a higher dimension. Every human weakness we see on a daily basis in the other person disappears, at least during this sacred and devo- tional act we perform. The love relationship turns into mutual stimula- tion for the awakening of consciousness. When lovers manage to reserve a space to see each other and them- selves as higher beings, a type of energy is created that is quite helpful in their daily life together. Sexual energy is increased when stimulated by the erotic ritual. This is the basis for the process of Tantric transformation. Partners who have been living together for a long time usually place too much emphasis on the human defects of the other partner. Even when they love each other, if they have partially lost their passion, they must arrive at the mutual decision to understand each other and feel again the intensity of the first period of their relationship. The force of sexual ritual helps them achieve this. The first thing a couple needs to do is to enter a sacred space-time, which is a lot more important than simply setting aside time and hav- ing a bedroom with flowers and decorations. It also entails entering a unique space-time—an inner place where there is no past or future, a place where everything converges. This magic place is created in the mind, in the awareness that something extraordinary is going to take place. Explained in simpler terms, it is like entering a space where a ritual will be held, while remaining aware that we are passing into a magic place where the here and now prevail—where we have left behind our problems and concerns and any memory of the past. In this space we'll approach the body of our lover as we would sa- cred soil. The body must be washed, purified, and perfumed in ac- knowledgment of its beauty and its transcendental dimension. Both bodies and both lovers are the expression of divinity. By loving each other, they rejoice in life, and energy is awakened.